The Last Starfighter
Tuesday, January 16, 2007

"Look at this Mom" Kendell says, nudging me with his foot. I glance over to see him kneeling on the couch next to me, peeking through the window blinds.

"Look at what?" I ask, not really wanting to put down my book and miss reading about which body part the hero planned on worshipping next.

"There's this light in the sky" he said, his voice muffled by the glass his nose was currently glued to.
"It's called a 'star' Kendell" I say dryly, not looking up from the detailed description of Marco's muscular, glistening chest.

"No it's not MOM, a star does not flicker in and out" he states impatiently.

"Then it's a plane" I reply, flipping pages till I find out exactly how talented a tongue Marco has.

"MOM! It can't be a plane, it's not MOVING. Please, would you just look??"

"Fine." I put the book down with a sigh, resigned to a life of celibacy both IN my imagination and out. Opening the front door we file out to gaze at the night sky. Kendell points out the mysterious light, almost bouncing up and down in his urgency. I look up into the crystal clear sky, stars blinking back at me, looking like little night lights in the dark blanket of the night. "Which light bud? There's a million stars out tonight."

"There Mom, see?" he points to a light that does seem to be stationary and blinks in and out.
"It's a plane Kendell" I say on a sigh, walking back inside to the promising warmth of Marco's flexing biceps. "Sometimes it looks like it's not moving because it's so far up. Or it could be a star that a cloud cover is moving over, making it look like it's going in and out."

"It's not a plane, or a star Mom" Kendell says emphatically, flopping back onto the couch to continue his surveillance of the night sky.

"Ok Kendell, what do you think it is?" I ask, already knowing where this is going.

"It's aliens Mom" he says with the gravity reserved for telling someone they have a month left to live.

My laugh barks out before I can stop it and Kendell gives me a look of wounded pride as he turns and plops down on the couch with a huff. Arms crossed over his chest, lower lip protruding, he looks at me and says, "fine. When the brain eating aliens land, don't expect ME to save you."

Smiling, I chuckle and say, "how exactly are you planning on defending yourself against the brain eating aliens?"

He reaches down beside the couch and pulls out his Nerf dart gun, brandishing it with a flourish, chest puffed to maximum "I'm gonna give them a little taste of the Kendellnator".

Eyeing the dart gun dubiously, I glance at his Rambo-esq pose and reply dead pan,
"Yes, if they are scared of soft squishy're good to go".

Anonymous cece had this to say:

Shall I send you a roll of aluminum foil or bubble wrap to create protective helmets??? LOL

9:08 PM, January 16, 2007 

Blogger Michael had this to say:

He's on the right track, though really you want to go with the Nerf N-Strike Longshot CS-6... you don't want to get too close to the alien target if you don't have too... I highly recommend it.

10:25 PM, January 16, 2007 

Blogger KaraMia had this to say:

LOL, he drools over that one every time we see it

10:30 PM, January 16, 2007 

Anonymous nila had this to say:

I hope Kendall's around with his "soft squishy projectiles" when the brain eating alien's attack me.

12:23 AM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

You never know with aliens. The nerf might just be the right weapon. Red Star 6 aliens can be repelled by bad tuna fish. Also, where did you find this book on my romancing skills and how did you know my name was Marco?

4:44 AM, January 17, 2007 

Blogger ƒåυνέ had this to say:

In Kendall's defense, soft squishy projectiles certainly scare the shit out of me...

4:58 AM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous Gypsy had this to say:

That kid is priceless.

6:26 AM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

All he needs now is a tin foil hat ; my nephew wears them frequently to counter the attacks from the wardrobe jedy or the invisible ninja...

7:37 AM, January 17, 2007 

Blogger Carrie had this to say:

Oh my blog! Too cute. But I am curious about this Marco. What do you think he looks like? Does he have sexy dark skin? You know we like them that way.

Also (well does this seem bad because you were talking about your kid) I remember years ago watching a porno called something like "Mork from Dork" and he was alien that came to satisfy. Maybe this may be your ship!

9:18 AM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

I friggin' love this kid!!! :)

9:34 AM, January 17, 2007 

Blogger KaraMia had this to say:

Cece: please send...Kendell is very
Nila: I'm sending him your way armed...he doesn't want to protect me since i'm a "doubter"
Troubles: I'm very good at finding out someone's skills, not so good at getting them to use it..
Fauve: well if your a brain eating alien....then kendells on the right track
Gypsy: oh no girl, that boy has a price and it usually involves chocolate ice cream
Trumpet: cece is sending him one so he should be good to go
Carrie: girl you crack me up. Marco indeed would have glistening skin the color of warm carmel...mmm, yummy. No, the porn reference isn't bad because the aliens inspired it...not the kid..LOL. If it's my ship..I think it's come and gone..sigh.
Beth: You may borrow him anytime!

12:23 PM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

By any chance has he seen the movie "Signs" recently? LOL!

I can just see the stance and serious look he was giving you.

12:43 PM, January 17, 2007 

Blogger Purring had this to say:

Sometimes I'm sad I don't have children of my own. This is one of those times.

1:18 PM, January 17, 2007 

Blogger Purring had this to say:

Sometimes I'm sad I don't have children of my own. This is one of those times.

1:18 PM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

The funny thing is, that's exactly whet they're scared off. ;)


1:25 PM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

If a Nerf dart gun is all it takes, our Army might actually be able to handle them

3:36 PM, January 17, 2007 

Anonymous InterstellarLass had this to say:

Zed has spotted aliens before too. Maybe they could get together and compare notes...and plan nerf-defenses.

11:28 AM, January 18, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

Ha. Boys are the greatest!

8:03 PM, January 18, 2007 

Blogger TamWill had this to say:

Life with boys is never boring!

9:21 PM, January 18, 2007 

Anonymous Anonymous had this to say:

Now I'm beginning to wonder which body part the brain-eating aliens planned on worshipping next. I guess I would put my money on the brain.

6:40 AM, January 19, 2007 

Blogger Callie had this to say:

Whenever I hear something like this, I always think of Randy Quaid in Independence Day. You know, everyone doubted him, too. Then they got 'sploded.


btw - your kid is PRICELESS!

9:09 AM, January 19, 2007 

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