Funny how even a small rope can lift you up beyond what you thought possible.
I received a gift in the mail shortly after Christmas this year and the simple kindness that it portrayed brought tears to my eyes. It's not often that we are reminded that others think of us, and that we are not as alone as we might feel.
Thank you Byron.
I hope to pay that kindness forward.
There are so many things I need in my life, so many requests that I can make but I am only asking this one small thing.
Each year Christmas is something I dread. My mother is gone and resides now with you. When she passed, she took with her the joy and excitement I found in the holiday. With her also went my security blanket, my traditions, and what made my family whole.
I struggle to find the spirit of Christmas for my son.
Please help me find succor and release from the guilt that hangs off my shoulders. Let me look past the money struggles and feelings of being alone, to find the magic that used to tickle up from my toes at the thought of Christmas. Let me enjoy each moment of this Christmas so that I can pass on those feelings to my child, so that he in turn may pass them to his own children.
Please help me let go of those things that I cannot change and embrace the joy of my child. Help me instill the rush of memories associated with melting fudge and sugar cookies. Let the sound of Christmas music warm him from the inside out and the excitement of the morning be about family and joy and not just toys. Grant me patience and humor and most of all,
please grant me peace.
I'm a recovering single mother trying desperately to see humor in my day to day toil while simultaneously avoiding reality as much as humanly possible.